Sunday, May 17, 2009

Wash those fears right outt my hair...

I had a rough night last night. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't find a book to hold my interest, no movies cried out to be watched, and the Kenny Vs Spenny marathon was all the episodes I'd seen before. So I tossed and I turned, my body as restless as my mind, and finally gave up around 7:30am and got up. I had had enough. Some of you may not know what that means for me. It means time for a change. Some of you may not know what THAT means for me. It means time to clean and organize. When my life is feeling overwhelming, you will always be able to tell because my physical space will be neat, tidy, organized and bordering on OCD territory. Hayden and I are sharing a room at the moment. While we patiently wait for "the phone call", we're sharing space, and using the spare room as our storage unit.

So... 2 single beds, 2 dressers, a night table, all his knick knacks, all his toys, all my books and knick knacks, and all my toys (My laptop, My cell, My journals, and my Nicey box). In your average room, there's not a lot of space for those things. But... the average room doesn't belong to an OCD Insomniac. So... The beds have been moved. The dressers have been moved. The Toys have been organized into neat little bins that are labeled. My back has significantly complained about having to move all the furniture, and right now is not letting me rest comfortably no matter what I do. MORE stuff has been packed, and MORE stuff has been marked for goodwill.

In the last 3 weeks, I have dropped off approx 36 boxes/bags of things to goodwill, including almost my entire book collection, and 75% of my movie collection. When "The Call" comes, and its time for us to go, I am not bringing any extra baggage with me. Our lives have been filled with that extra baggage for too long, and as much as my S.O. and I acknowledge that we needed that baggage to make us the people we are today, but.. this is it... time for it to go. But poor him. He's not here to say "Wait.. I'm not ready to throw that out yet" or "I wanted that a little longer". Its gone. He knows what I've gotten rid of, and luckily I'm mature enough to recognize that not all of the baggage can go. BUT... when the time comes, we will be leaving with a whole lot less then we first intended.

While I couldn't sleep last night, I did some Internet searching. Trying to find some interesting stuff to put in the blog. Here's what I came up with...

The following table shows both the average (median) response and the range of 95% of LDRs from a sample of over 200.

  • How far apart do they live?Average: 125 miles95% range: 30 miles to 950 miles
    My SO and I are JUST under the high end at 948.5 miles
  • How often do they visit one another?Average: 1.5 times a month95% range: once a week to once every four months
    I wish I had an answer for this one. It's been 7 weeks so far, and who knows how long before we get to see each other again :(
  • How often do they call one another?Average: once every 2.7 days95% range: at least once a day to once a month
    We used to call every night right as we got into bed. But phone cards tend to add up. But with Skype and MSN, we hear each other's voice AT LEAST once a day.
  • How long are their telephone calls typically?Average: 30 minutes95% range: 2 minutes to 1 hour 20 minutes
    Our phone calls are about 30-45 min, because its bed time. Our Chats... we average about 4 hours a night.. longer if its a bad day.
  • How often do they write one another (not including email)?Average: three letters a month95% range: never to every other day
    The first 3 weeks, I would say I mailed an envelope about every 3 days. :) We've cut down, but now its better, because they are unexpected, and when they come mean that much more.
  • How long do they expect to be separated before they can move closer to one another?Average: 14 months95% Range: one month to four years
    Hmm... this is another hard one for us. Ideally, we'd both like it to be sooner rather then later. BUT, we both know that things need to happen at the right time, so we're impatiently patient.

A lot of people tend to think of a LDR as a phase, something that won't last. That can be terrifying for someone who is facing one, when all of their friends give them that "poor gullible you" look. When they talk about going to be with their loved one, and suddenly everyone else is very interested in the pattern of the carpet. My SO and I are very lucky to have two great examples of LDR's that have worked right in our own families. My cousin and his now wife were separated on and off for many years before they were married. My SO's sister and her now husband were countries apart and now living happily ever after. By looking at them when we start to wonder what will be, it gives us the strength to hold on to the promises we've made each other. (not to mention we've written them to each other time and time again, and like I like to remind him... Its now a legally binding contract :P )

Whats my point for today? I don't think I have one. My mind has been wandering, my body has been restless, and my thoughts have meandered here and there. So... today there is no life lesson, no pearls of wisdom (unless don't move a whole whack of furniture on your own counts). Just a girl... missing her guy. (I may be back to post again. :P Once he's home from his trip, I'll probably have more lovey-dovey things to add <3>

No comments:

Post a Comment